... trying to find nice clothes for my figure

I put on a lot of weight during my thesis write-up.  Obviously, I wish I hadn't, but life was so desperately difficult (for more reasons than just the thesis) at that time that I turned to comfort food BIG time.  The result is that now, a year on, I am a stone heavier than before, and a dress size bigger.  I could try to lose the weight, but I love food and booze too much and lack motivation (yeah yeah i know i should blah blah).  So maybe I should resign myself to being a bit bigger, and buy clothes accordingly. During the dark days a tracksuit top and bottoms, or a crappy old tartan shirt and leggings were the order of the day (more accommodating for stuffing myself with chocolate of course..) but now I'm back in the real world i need to get my fashion mojo back, but can't find anything that I think will suit me. All the fashion websites and clothes shops (esp, here in Australia) cater solely for size 8 tinies, of which I certainly am not one.  This is frustrating me a lot.  It's possible to be a little chunky and still stylish, i know this because I see a lot of very lovely larger ladies dressing incredibly well walking around, but where do they get their clothes from? Wow, a whole post about clothes...  maybe i should go read a book or something... Bx

.....listening to music

I love music. It's one of the most important things in my life and it's fair to say the listening of it is one of my major pastimes. I love how it has the ability to reach deep into you and bring up strong emotions of euphoria or desperation with the simple change of a chord or tempo.  I love how it can take you to exactly the mood and the environment the musician was immersed in whilst writing the song, without using any spoken word, or more so, the umms, yeeaaahs or likes and y'knows that dilute the communication of those moods in speech. I am eternally jealous of people who can pick up an instrument and open up their world in such an eloquent way. At the moment I am eternally grateful to Spotify for broadening my musical horizons, and far from taking away from the music industry, since I have signed up I have seen more live music and bought more albums than ever in my life.
Favourites at the moment:

Laura Marling
Emmy the Great
Frank Turner
Noah and the Whale
Johnny Flynn and the Sussex Wit
Slow Club
City and Colour
Fionn Regan
Josh Ritter

....watch this space.
Bx

.....creating a blog

...why? I'm not sure.  I hope it will become apparent.  But I realise I live in the age of technology and global communication and there are still some things about it that mystify me. Such as being able to write a diary online. Something about the psychology of doing it is fascinating, and yet I don't yet know what. Why do it? I don't know. Do I want someone to read it? I don't know. If I didn't I guess I'd write in a book and keep it stashed away. I've always been drawn to writing diaries but never had the patience to stick it out through the doldrum days. Maybe by typing on a page for the world to see maybe it makes it more interesting (to me at least). I wonder if, being a child of the Commodore Amiga era (where the best you could do is type half way down the page, but never save, consequently i wrote many half-stories), and also remembering what it's like to be running half an hour late without any way of being able to notify your impatient friend, except being lucky enough to find a glass box that smelled of piss while you fumble around for 10p.... it's because of the liberty that is afforded by being able to open the thoughts and ramblings that you usually keep to yourself in front of the world. But why would one want to do that? I know at least one person of my generation who simply cannot understand the reason anyone would sign up to Facebook. Why would one want to keep a blog? I am hoping to find out.  If nothing else, maybe it will come in useful one day to publicise my breakthrough novel or solo EP... hmm not not too likely. Well, for now, it will be what it will be... Bx